Losing our hair is a phase of life we all want to miss out on. Some people are blessed with luscious locks of hair that last a lifetime. Others are stuck with genes leading to the dreadfully slow process of shedding hair that just won’t come back. Rumor has it that the destiny of a man’s hairline is found on the head of his maternal grandfather. However, the uncertainty about this “hair destiny” becomes clear when uncle Bob and uncle Joe show up to dinner with a completely different head of hair. Scientists are aware of emotional distress that hair loss causes, yet no magic pill or cream will keep the hair on our heads. Still, the research must go on. A recent bizarre breakthrough involving McDonald’s french fries brought the world a whole lot closer to eternal voluminous mains for all!

The chemical successfully leads to the mass production of hair follicle germs (HFG), and its the first time they’ve been produced this way. Hair follicle germs are crucial when it comes to the hair-loss equation. The innovative science team mastered the hair game and produced around 5,000 HFG’s at the same time. They then took the HIG’s and planted them into nude backs of the lab mice. “These self-sorted hair follicle germs were shown to be capable of efficient hair-follicle and shaft generation upon injection into the backs of nude mice,” Fukuda, a member of the team said.

Although the whole process sounds complex, Fukuda explains that it is actually a very simple method for hair restoration. “This simple method is very robust and promising,” Fukuda said. “We hope this technique will improve human hair regenerative therapy to treat hair loss such as androgenic alopecia (male pattern baldness). In fact, we have preliminary data that suggests human HFG formation using human keratinocytes and dermal papilla cells.”

All this news is fine and dandy. If these scientists got it right, then the world will be a much happier place. However; in the midst of this joyful breakthrough there is the lasting question, “what the heck is in our french fries?” Thus far, McDonald’s did not comment on the discovery. For now, all there is to do is hope that McDonald’s fries won’t cause any unwanted hair growth.