How Strict Is Too Strict? The Truth Behind Kate Gosselin’s Tough Love

Jon and Kate Plus 8 is one of America’s best reality TV shows. Jon and Kate have a unique story that includes a sextuplet pregnancy. The nation was hooked on watching these two average joes figure out how to live life with a set of twins and sextuplets. While they tried their hardest to succeed as a family, the pressures of being famous worked against them. Unfortunately, staff members, close friends and anyone else looking for a paycheck spilled juicy details about their personal lives. The bad press is what eventually leads to a split in Jon and Kate’s marriage.

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As custody battles were ongoing until recently, Kate had to figure out how to be a single mother. When you pretty much run a daycare consisting of your own kids, it’s hard to manage things without a tight system. Kate’s former housekeepers went to the magazines and let them in on a few rules that helped Kate and the kids get everything they needed doing.

How Jon & Kate Fell in Love

Jon and Kate got married at a young age. They met in 1997 when Jon was working in a hotel, and Kate just finished nursing school. Kate accompanied a friend to a party held at the hotel where Jon was working. She saw a man walking across the grass, and he caught her attention.

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She promised she would not leave the place until she met him. Jon said that he was doing nothing with his life at the time, he didn’t have goals to get married or have kids. Jon fell in love too. He called his current girlfriend and broke up with her to be with Kate. Eventually, they got married and decided to have kids

They Started Out With Two Baby Girls… Twins Maddie and Cara

Kate was really excited about starting a family with twin girls, Maddie and Cara. The joy of having these girls were enough to make them want to have more kids.

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The family life really suited Jon and Kate. They knew they wanted a bigger family but they could have never expected how big it was going to get. That’s where the journey to expand their family, began.

Unexpected Difficulties

As Kate was trying harder and harder to have children she realized that something was off. She went to her gynecologist and discovered that she has a disease called PCOS.

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PCOS makes it difficult to have children. People with this disease sometimes need fertility treatments so Jon and Kate decided that they would go ahead and try it.

The Treatments Worked too Well

Jon and Kate got the good news, Kate was pregnant! It’s not uncommon for fertility treatments to result in a pregnancy with multiples. That’s exactly what happened

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Kate discovered that she didn’t have twins; she had sextuplets! Six babies were in her belly! Although having this many babies at once can often cause complications and is dangerous for the mother, Kate decided she had to go for it.

America Couldn’t Get Enough

Before Kate gave birth, the Octomom (a mother who had 8 children at the same time) made the news. Once the word spread that another mother was having a large number of babies at once, the media decided they wanted to know more!

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Jon and Kate Plus 8 was born and America could not get enough of it!

The Pressures of Fame Destroyed Their Relationship

Being famous is one thing, but having a family of a set of twins and sextuplets while being famous is another! Kate mentioned that she and Jon heard that parents of multiples have a low chance of staying together.

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She said she thought she would be able to beat the statistics but she was wrong. The stress was building and they got a divorce.

Jon and Kate Go Their Separate Ways

While the marriage wasn’t working out, Kate was on tour promoting a book she wrote about her life as a mother. During this time rumors started to spread. All famous couples face this challenge, that’s why they decided to work on their marriage a little more.

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Not to mention, the TV networked urged them to stay together for the sake of the show. Eventually, the pressures of fame and the tabloids made it hard for Jon and Kate to stay together.

How Mady and Cara Reacted to the Divorce

Cara reacted worse than Mady. She broke down into tears and said: “ you told us it was bad but it’s going to get better and now it’s still bad.” Her mother replied saying “it’s but it still will get better. I promise”

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Mady may be Cara’s twin but she was much more accepting of the matter when it happened. She said she could have guessed that this was going to happen and that it came to no surprise to her at all. Though this seems to be better it just shows how obvious it was they were coming to an end.

Kate is One Tough Cookie!

Kate was a single mother for a long time. She and Jon were going through some tough custody battles all while attempting to raise their kids. Kate’s nanny and staff from the show eventually leaked just how Kate ran her household… and it sounded like military school.

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One babysitter gave all the details about Kates rules and some found them too harsh. Others think her rules are totally normal.

Kate’s Nanny Manual is a Bit Extreme

When you watch the show it’s clear that Kate has a type A personality. What makes it even more clear is that she has a manual for her housekeepers and babysitters to read so that they know exactly what to do.

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According to one housekeeper, the manual included her pet peeves which include door slamming and leaving anything on the floor.

Everything Stops At 9:00… Including Mommy Duty

The housekeeper said that one of Kate’s rules was that once the clock strikes 9:00 PM, Kate and all the staff are off duty. That means that if the dishes are half done, the housekeeper needs to put everything down and go home. This off-duty thing also applies to mommy duty.

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Kate lives a stressful life, she wants to go to bed as early as she can, so she tells the kids not to bother her after this hour. While it makes sense, it’s hard for children to understand this sort of rule at a young age.

Kate Keeps a Close Ear on Jon and the Kids

While the custody wars started escalating, Kate needed to know what her children were saying to their father and what their father was telling his kids. This sounds a little intense but Kate and Jon to this day are not fans of each other.

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She wanted to ensure her kids weren’t told false information about her. Kate asks her housekeepers and or babysitters to listen in on their conversations with their father.

The Children Arrive at Jon’s Empty Handed

This is another rule that looks crazier than it is. Jon was not paying child support and Kate was not just going to stop buying her children things to wear or play with. She wanted to make sure that Jon would do his share and pay for some of the kid’s belongings.

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She made sure to keep this up by having them go to their father’s house dressed in their school uniforms. When they had to go back to their mother’s house they would change back into the uniform.

No Electronics for Two Reasons

For a long time, Kate refused to buy her children electronics. First, she didn’t want her kids to be exposed to the media that was bashing her and their father.

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The second reason she nixed phones and iPads was that if she buys something for one of them, she then has to buy one for all of them! This makes total sense, but some say it excludes them from reality.

Kate Performed a Routine Pat Down of the Kids After They Came Back From Dads House

Jon and Kate were not on the same page about a lot of things. So when Kate said she didn’t want her children to have their own phones, she wanted to make sure Jon was not going against these wishes.

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One nanny claimed that she saw Kate do a routine pat-down on her kids when they came back from their dad’s house to make sure they were not sneaking any electronics in the house. Perhaps this was one way Jon tried to speak to his kids without having a third party listening.

Like in Many Families, Yard Duty is a Punishment

for kids who grew up in homes where yard duty was a chore, this one doesn’t sound so bad. However, Jon used this in court to try and win custody of the kids.

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This is because one of the children didn’t know the difference between harmless weeds and poison ivy and she ended up getting a serious rash for days without knowing what it was.

No Sweets and Treats… Ever

Some parents like to use sweets and treats to teach their children to delay gratification. Usually, parents give their kids the goods on special occasions.

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Kate refused all sweets in general. One housekeeper claimed that after the kids made gingerbread houses they were given strict orders not to eat them.

Kate Believes in Spanking While Jon is Totally Against it

One nanny claimed to have quit her job because she witnessed Kate spank one of the kids who was misbehaving. According to her, Kate did it in front of the other children to show them what will happen if they misbehave too.

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We have to keep in mind that people are getting paid to talk to magazines and there is no way of knowing what is true and what an easy lie to get a fat check from a gossip magazine. Jon heard this rumor and used it in court to try and win custody.

Kate Overcomes Rumors and Investigations

After some of Kate’s staff went to the tabloids and told a mix of truths and lies, Kate had to be investigated by Child Services. Kate says she’s a good mom and has nothing to hide.

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After she was investigated, which happened more than once, child services said that Kate is a great mom.

Kate Gave Things to The Kids so She Can Take Them Away.

Kate admitted that it was only a matter of time before she gave her kids phones, iPads, and computers. However, in a side interview on the show, Kate said that the reason she gave her kids these things was so that she can take them away if they misbehave.

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Kids do love their electronics, and the Gosselin kids in specific have to deserve theirs.

The Kids Have to Eat Their Lunch Even if They Don’t Like it

Being a mother of eight children makes it hard to get creative when it comes to packing lunch. Kate buys food in bulk and packs the same lunch for all her kids. Jon claimed that one of his kids was upset because she was sent to school with a lunch that she didn’t like.

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When she told her mom she refused to eat it, Kate sent the same exact lunch over and over until they ate it.

Collin Went Missing From the Show and Jon Didn’t Know Where He Went

According to Kate, Collin was diagnosed with some behavioral issues and needed extra help to learn how to cope with rules. Collin was sent to a strict facility where he learned life skills.

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The facility he went to was so strict that he could not even come home for his own birthday. Fans were really curious where he was and when the tabloids asked Jon about it, he said he also was not told exactly where Collin went and that the information given to him was vague. Collin is now out of the facility and living at home with is siblings.

A Ten Year Custody Battle

After Jon and Kates divorce Kate won full custody of the children. Jons cheating and disloyalty made him look bad in the courtroom.

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Jon needed to get a job and quit the partying life if he wanted to see his children more. However today it’s pretty unclear who gets the kids. The battle continues…

Hannah Chose Jon over Kate

Although the custody of the kids was granted to their mother, Hannah (one of the sextuplets) was seen in several pictures with her father.

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Apparently, she claimed that she preferred to live with Jon, and therefore was given more time with him.

Jon’s Bad Behavior…

Jon claims to have gone through some sort of midlife crisis. He was spotted partying with groups of women. He worked as a stripper, and a DJ to make money.


This type of behavior made it even harder for him to get any more time with is kids.

Jon’s Dating Life Took Off Right After the Divorce

Jon was over the marriage before it was actually and officially over. He was ready to start dating… publicly.

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As far as we know, he’s dated six women before meeting a girl he decided to go steady with … Colleen

They Only See Their Dad in Groups of Four

Jon is still allowed to see his kids, despite what the media was saying about him and his wild behavior. However, he’s only allowed to see four kids at a time.

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In an interview a few years back he stated that he had not seen all of his kids in the same place for three years.

Jon Says the Kate is Brainwashing the Kids

Jon released a statement saying that Kate was brainwashing the kids to make them think he’s bad so that they won’t live with him.

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He told the court to look into it, but before they could, the eldest girls said some things to clear it up.

They Call Their Dad Insane

“He makes it seem like we’re being kept from him, which is insane,” Mady told People.

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“He should maybe spend some time thinking about why we don’t want to see him, and maybe realize that if he ever does want a relationship with us, talking about us on TV is not the way to make that happen.”

Kate Breaks Custody Agreement and Deals With Police

Part of the Gosselin custody agreement is that when the kid is at Jon’s Kate cannot go over and interfere.

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One night Kate had an issue with the babysitter Jon chose and she drove over his place to check on the kids. Police were called and she was let off with a warning

Whoopi Goldberg Criticizes Kate on Live TV

Shortly after the custody mishap, Kate was invited on the talk show “The View.” After explaining what happened, Whoopi lashed out at Kate telling her she was wrong to violate the rules.

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Even if she doubted the babysitter, she could have ended up in jail and really never see her kids. Kate defended herself but Whoopi just changed the topic.

Mady and Cara Choke Up on TV and it Was Seriously Awkward

Maddie and Cara were given a chance to defend themselves on live television. Magazines were saying that the children of their family are messed up.

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When the show host asked them questions, neither of them were able to speak. They were too shy and Kate had to speak on their behalf.

Cast and Crew Members Say Kate Freaks Out Backstage

People who were on the set of the show told magazines that Kate shouted at Mady and Cara for not speaking. “You embarrassed Mommy,” is what one staff member heard Kate say.

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Apparently, Kate was really upset that the girls blew their chance to stand up for themselves.

Jon Shames Kate and Demands Custody

When Jon saw the interview with the girls he said that this was just one example of how the mother of eight treats everyone like crap.

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He says they shouldn’t have been in that position and their mom should not have spoken to them in that way… He asked for more custody.

Jon Gets His Life Together

Jon’s midlife crisis ended and Jon realized he needed to buckle down and get serious. He is now working as an IT administrator and makes a decent amount of money.

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His actions make him more credible but it was not enough for him to get his kids back.

Jon Settles Down With Coleen

Part of ending the midlife crisis was settling down with one woman. Jon really seems to like Colleen and posted pictures of the two on vacation.

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“Best vacation ever with Colleen,” he wrote in the caption. They seem to really hit it off.

People Magazine Reports That Jon is Denied More Custody

Despite his efforts to be a better dad, he was not given any more custody privileges. Kate still has full custody and Jon is not happy about it.

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He wants to see his kids more and he’s made such drastic changes in his life. He’s upset he’s not getting more time.

Hold Up… Jon Says He Has Full Custody of Hannah

Jon posted a live Instagram video with Mady in the background. He said Hannah was making him a hot dog and that he has full custody of her.

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This confused many fans after they read that Kate had custody of all the children.

The Rumors Proved to Be True

Hannah is not a young girl anymore. She’s old enough to decide if she wants to be with her dad, and she chose to move in with him.

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Kate is not happy with Jon having any custody of the children and has allegedly appealed the court’s decision allowing Hannah to live with her dad.

Jon Was Not Lying! Hannah Lives With Him

The judge did allow Hannah to move in with her father. She’s always wanted to and now that she’s old enough to say what she wants, the judge allows her to permanently live with her dad.

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Hannah has moved in and so far, Kate is not handling it well. She’s been in court trying to get her out of his house.

All of The Kids are Banned From Instagram… Unless They Live With Jon

Kate Flips Out When Hannah Opened an Instagram account. This may be normal for a 14-year-old but Kate is totally against it.

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None of the other children have an Instagram and that’s how she wants things to stay.

Hannah’s Instagram Goes Black

A few days after Jon announced that Hannah has her own Instagram account… fans saw that the account was deleted!

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Kate was going to use this in court to prove that Hannah should now be staying at her fathers’. Kate views Instagram as a threat to the kid’s safety.

Kate Tries to Get Back on TV. She Claims She Needs the Money

Jon and Kate did not have steady jobs before they had children. The show distracted them from excelling in their careers and this posed a serious issue.

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The show was a huge source of income but now she says all the money is gone. Eight kids are totally expensive.

Where Did All the Money Go?

Kate went on a talk show to catch the world up on how life is with her and the kids. The host asked here where all the money went and Kate gave a great explanation. Kate said her main priority is to help her kids go to college.

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“They will go to college,” she said. It makes perfect sense. Tuition for 8 kids is a truckload of money!

Kate Swaps Families for TV Show

Kate decides to go on a reality TV show called “Celebrity Wife Swap.” She traded places with a former Playboy Bunny named Kendra. They traded families, lived in each other’s homes and had to take care of each other’s kids… Kendra missed her old life.


The mother of one got to experience the life of a single mom with 8 kids. Wait until you read her reaction

Kate’s Reaction to Being a Mother of One

Kate really enjoyed being a mother of one for a week. When Kate got to live in Kendra’s shoe’s she said it felt like she wasn’t in real life.

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Kate saw that Kendra’s husband treated her, cooked dinner, and handed her a glass of wine at the end of the day. Kate said she never had this much free time in a while

What Kendra Thinks About Kate’s Kids

Kendra was totally impressed. She mentioned that all the kids were so self-sufficient and smart. They were all on a schedule and knew what they had to do.

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Kendra was shocked that the Gosselin kids were able to cut an avocado with a knife on their own. “The fact that Kate does this everyday… I can’t even believe it,” Kendra says.

Kate Says That Kendra’s Husband is an Enabler

Kate realized that Hank, Kendra’s husband enables Kendra’s lazy behavior. He does everything for Kendra including waking up early and taking care of their son.

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She said that Kendra should probably take on more responsibility and spend more time with her husband.

Kendra Thinks Kids Should Get to Be Kids

Kendra saw how many chores the kids had to do. While she admires how responsible they are, she feels bad because she thinks a kid should just be a kid.


However, She understands that when you’re a single mom with this much chaos going on, you can’t do everything by yourself.

Jon’s Friend Writes an E-Book Against Kate

Jon’s friend, Robert Hoffman, who is also a writer for tabloids, decided to write an ebook about who Kate really is. According to him, she’s a child abuser, an alcoholic, and a racist.

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The book is titled “Kate Gosselin, Hoe She Fooled the World.” Hoffman claims to have the inside scoop that everyone wants to hear. Some of the claims warranted investigation from child services.

Hoffman Says Kids Were Traumatized By the Wife Swap

Amongst the multiple reports, Hoffman released about Kate being a bad mother, was an article explaining that the Gosselin kids were traumatized by the show.

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They had no idea who this new woman taking care of them was. According to him the kids were freaked out by the whole thing and just wanted their mother to come back

Kate Sues Hoffman Claiming He Lied in His Book

Kate is trying to sue Hoffman for allegedly hacking into her computer to get information for his “tell-all” e-book that is slamming Kate’s parenting style.


She claims he went into her personal files when he was over the house. Hoffman agreed not to publish the ebook but loads of info was leaked anyways.

The Twins Say They’re Worried About Kate Being Single

Mady and Cara will go off to college in the near future. While their fathers love life has taken off, their mother’s had less luck.


Kate said that the girls are constantly worried that their mothers will be all alone with the sextuplets when they leave

Kate is Back on TV… Get Ready for Kate Plus Date!

So if you think you had enough of this family, just get ready for more. Kate will now be on a new reality tv show that follows Kate on her journey to find love again!


At least now her two girls won’t have to worry about her when they go off to college.

Kate Went Through So Much But Doesn’t Regret it

Kate has been mocked and criticized countless times. She even had a Halloween costume made to look like her.


Kate laughed it off and says ten years worth of family footage was worth it.

Kate Says She’s a Much Better Mom Now

Kate told an interviewer that now that she has loads of mom experience, she’s more relaxed. Kate knows what to expect and feels more in control of her life.

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She said now she’s a better mother and is very proud of that fact.

Kate’s Net Worth

Kate has been more than willing to jump on a talk show, go on a book tour and do whatever it takes to make money… respectfully.


She’s worth 200,000 dollars which is a lot but divide that by the needs of 8 children!

Jon’s Net Worth

Part of the reason why Jon doesn’t have full custody is that his net worth won’t support 8 children. Jon’s net worth is $10,000.

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However, he only recently began a decent job and if he works hard he’ll end up being worth more. Loads of fans are rooting for him.

Jon Wins Custody Over Collin

Jon just won temporary sole legal and physical custody of Collin who is 14 years old. Jon attended the court hearing in Pennsylvania where the judge made this new decision. Kate was not present for the hearing. She asked for the date to be postponed but the request was not granted.

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Collin had spent the past three years in an educational center. He had not seen his father all this time. Finally, they met up and Collin said he wanted to live with his father. Jon has been through hell and back in the media, that’s why he didn’t make any comments about this new development. Jon, Collin, and Hanna will now be living together.